Double Icing – Day 637

Carol’s Chocolate Cake with Double Icing – Photo: L. Weikel

Double Icing

It’s been a running request for years now. Whenever I asked Karl what he wanted for his birthday (meaning which confection would he like me to bake), he’d blurt out, “Double icing!” He didn’t care which of the two in my vast culinary repertoire I baked (Aunt Grace’s Walnut Torte or Carol’s Chocolate Cake) as long as I made ‘double icing.’

This request is a throwback to the days when my sister and brother-in-law would bake one of Aunt Grace’s Cakes for Karl’s birthday – and would whip up an extra batch of icing for him, plopping generous multiple tablespoonsful into cupcake liners for him to hoard in the freezer. Ah yes, the hedonistic pleasures of youth.

Those particular indulgences took place in what now feels like another time, another era. As our lives unfolded (and our waistlines expanded) a time came when Karl realized that icing ‘cupcakes’ were unbelievably indulgent and not exactly the healthiest thing to consume on an even fairly infrequent basis. (In other words, his requests for these icing nuggets came to a reluctant end after both of us lost a good chunk of weight 30 years ago.)

The Request Renewed

Slowly over time, though, as these things tend to wriggle their way back into our consciousness, Karl started espousing the, “if the icing on the cake is scrumptious, then twice as much would be even better” approach to life. But I held firm.

For a long time, in fact, I held firm. Part of me vaguely recalls giving in maybe once as his annual requests grew more plaintive – but I can’t be sure. If I did, it was probably a year or two after Karl (our son) passed away, figuring I could assuage some of the sadness by dosing it with butter and sugar. This is especially true since there were only four days between the two Karls’ birthdays.

Fast Forward to Today

Perhaps as a result of the pandemic and wanting to surprise him with a guilty pleasure, or perhaps as a result of the stunning fact that Karl didn’t even once yelp, “Double icing!” in my general direction as August started unfurling its katydid nights, I decided to indulge his desires this year.

Without even asking for it, Karl received Carol’s Chocolate Cake with double icing. (Rest assured that was the cake he requested this year – I’d never deign to make that decision for him.)

Speaking for myself, double icing is too much of a good thing. Gobs of butter cream icing drown out the deliciousness of the dark chocolate, coffee-infused cake. And besides that, my whole body starts to buzz.

Karl practically passed out after eating his massively generous slice tonight. I wonder if he’s now cured of asking for “double icing!” or if next year he’ll just ask for Aunt Grace’s Walnut Torte (and the obscene icing cupcakes of our misspent youth).

Yeah. Double icing is evil – Photo: L. Weikel

 

(T-474)

Karl’s Here – Day 274

 

“Where’s Mom?” – Photo – L. Weikel

Karl’s Here!

Oh, how I wish I could hear those words again (pertaining to my Karl Daniel). You know – how we excitedly call out to alert the household when someone we’ve been waiting for finally pulls in the driveway or arrives at the door.

Given that it’s past midnight and thus technically August 13th, it’s officially Karl’s birthday.

Consequently, he’s been on my mind maybe a smidge more than usual? I don’t know. That’s hard to gauge.

This weekend, though, his presence was obvious. Both full days of the Listening Retreat (Saturday and Sunday), my Medicine Card ‘picks’ for the day had Raccoon underneath. And Raccoon, in our household, is associated with Karl. So I took that to mean that Karl was holding space for me, holding and supporting me, as I supported my “Listeners.”

I also had some encounters with him in two different journeys, too. I should probably mention here that this is extremely uncommon. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve ever met with him in journeys ever before…

So imagine my delight, as my lovely hosts and I settled in for the evening, when we discovered these absolutely bold but adorable bandits raiding the birdfeeders?!? The three little ones busily munching the birdseed on the ground, suddenly realizing Mom is nowhere to be found…

“There she is!” (oomph) – Photo – L. Weikel

But wait! What?!? She’s up the pole, guzzling hummingbird nectar, sloppily slurping her precious libations and hoarding them to herself.

Of course, I can’t help but know Karl is here.

“We want some!” Photo – L. Weikel

(T-837)