judgment

Hunker Down – Day 998

Posted on by Lisa Weikel Leave a comment
Arf! – Photo: L. Weikel

Hunker Down

Is it just me? Or are you guys feeling it too? Lately I can’t even walk into the grocery store without feeling an edginess in the air that’s unlike anything I’ve felt before (especially in the grocery store!). Even when the pandemic was first starting to rear its ugly head back in March and April 2020, I didn’t feel this level of anxiety in the general populace. If you ask me it’s time to hunker down again.

OK, I’ll admit it. That’s coming from a person who probably would choose ‘Hunkering Down for $200, Alex.” In all honesty, I’d choose it for free.

The last thing I feel like doing is getting into a discussion with someone in the produce aisle who’s on a hair trigger over the fact that I’m wearing a mask. And believe it or not, I felt the possibility of that happening twice this week. I nearly fell over.

No to the Boston

And then another time this week, I saw a person walking across the parking lot I’d just entered with a cute little Boston Terrier on a leash. Well. You can all imagine how I swooned. Ooooh, how this puppy reminded me of Sheila when she was just a girl.

I jumped out of my car, whipped my debit card in and out of the meter to throw some money on it and turned to speak to the Boston and her daddy. “Your Boston is adorable!” I called out with a big smile. “I have two!” (never fully admitting to myself that Sheila is really gone).

Neither of us were wearing masks (we were in the great outdoors), and I asked if I could pet his pup. “Aren’t you concerned with…” he asked, waving his free hand in the air.

I stopped in my tracks. We were a good 20 feet away from each other. “What?” I was genuinely puzzled. Surely he knew I had no intention of getting anywhere near him. I just wanted to say hi to his pup.

“Covid,” he responded. I was taken aback. Honestly, it had never even occurred to me that I wouldn’t be permitted to pet a dog on a 10’ leash. You don’t get Covid from pet fur. Or even from surfaces. You get it from aerosols in the air; hence why it’s wise to wear masks when indoors.

“Oh,” I replied. “Would it bother you…?”

“Yes, it would, as a matter of fact.” Ugh. His tone. It had turned so…icy.

Backed Off

Whoa. OK. Of course I immediately stopped in my tracks (still about 15 feet away from the dog dad and five feet away from the Boston, which had of course had immediately responded to my high pitched hello to it and headed my way). I felt like I’d been smacked.

My reaction was silly, I suppose. But his abrupt attitude took me by such surprise.

It’s hard to know where anyone stands anymore. Or how they will react to many of the circumstances we used to consider mundane.

Makes me just want to hunker down in my own safe place. I haven’t a clue as to how people feel about anything anymore. And the enormity of that almost brought me to tears.

Spartacus in Repose – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-113)

Ask the Crone – Day 785

Posted on by Lisa Weikel Leave a comment

Ask the Crone

Here we are again, at the beginning of a week that could have ramifications that extend from our own personal survival to that of our democracy, and indeed influence the balance of power in the world. Yeah, I know. It sounds hyperbolic. But if we’re honest, anyone who’s paying attention knows it’s true. So in order to give us some guidance and perspective as we navigate this week, I decided to ask the Crone.

I sat with my Tarot of the Crone deck and closed my eyes. I held within an awareness of the challenges we’re facing this week and started shuffling the cards. I could feel myself yearning for some kind of light, some indication from Spirit of what we should hold in our hearts as we witness the coming events unfold.

Where We Are/Where We’re Headed

I chose two cards. The first was to help us understand where we are; what we’re experiencing. And the second card I chose was where we’re headed; what’s coming; what’s in store for us.

Visually, just laying the cards out beside each other was stunning. They are remarkably similar at first glance, but the differences, while subtle, are unquestionably meaningful. And it’s not insignificant that I chose two Major Arcana cards. (Out of the 78 cards in a tarot deck, only 22 are Major Arcana and represent powerful archetypal concepts.) The fact that both cards are ‘Majors’ reinforces my sense of this week’s importance.

I also found it meaningful that Where We Are is only one card away from the end of the Majors. It is number XX, and in this deck its name is “Calling.” It doesn’t escape me that in traditional tarot decks, the XX card is called “Judgment.” We’re pretty much at the end game in our democracy. Our system is being challenged in ways the founders almost certainly never imagined. And yet…the Where We’re Headed Card is the very first card of the entire deck. We’re headed – hmmm. Back to the drawing board?  Back to “Go” so we can redefine a more perfect union?

Even beyond the Constitutional crisis we’re approaching, there’s the horrifying reality of the surge in the pandemic creating vertical spikes in numbers of infections, which will inevitably lead to spikes in hospitalizations and, ultimately, deaths. Add to that the discovery of several mutations of the virus – the most recent, I believe, being in South Africa – and once again the eerie appropriateness of the “Calling” or “Judgment” card is obvious.

Tarot of the Crone by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince – XX Calling

Where We Are: XX – Calling

“Come

It is time for you to wear the cloak

Accept your power

And accept your responsibility

Come

Be with me now

Show me your power

The Crone holds up a red cloak, asking you to wear it, calling you to join her. She appears as a shadowy fantastical bird. The background is the rich blue of the deep sky. The red and blue represent power and justice. These are the colors and this is the card of the superhero. How an ordinary human can become extraordinary is the mystery of this card and it has nothing to do with anything you’ve been told before.

When you get this card, your life is changing, whether you want it to or not. From this change arises an opportunity to become greater in person and spirit, to step up to another level. Something is asked of you and you feel urged to respond. If your response is resistance, know it will take more energy from you than accepting the challenge would. This is your big moment. Take your courage, the strength of your heart, and fly.”

It seems to me that we are all being ‘called’ at this juncture to step up. To be superheroes for the greater good – to demand the right use of power and reinforce our belief in justice. This is big. History will judge us by our reactions and responses in the coming days.

Tarot of the Crone by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince – 0 Fool

Where We’re Headed: 0 – Fool

“To know me, you must first know this ~

In the Beginning, as in the End,

There is Nothing

Behind your ordinary world

Behind all manifestation

Lies the Void

I am the emptiness surrounding the universe

I am the uncertainty of the electron

I am the nothingness hiding in your soul

In the Void you have no name

Words do not exist

You have no memory, no past or future

Time does not exist

You find no landmarks, you have no body

Matter does not exist

But You

You may still exist

A mere spark of awareness

But that is enough

That is where you begin

The Cloak of the Crone is all you hear, all you see, all you know of your everyday world. Only a Fool would try to see what lies beneath. Only a Fool abandons the known for the unknown and perhaps unknowable. Only a Fool risks becoming lost in the Void, becoming a tiny star in endless space.

A force beyond your small self opens a new space in your soul. You are impelled to start on a new path. One in which you cannot predict the final destination, or possibly even the next step, but feels inevitable all the same. Can you truly trust the Universe? In the Void, where there is no up and no down, you can do nothing else. Remember there is a part of you that wants this, that welcomes it, because it knows becoming formless and timeless is what you need to create a new future.”

It seems to me that where we’re headed is uncharted territory. This is the time when we have the power and responsibility to create and hold a vision of what we want to manifest as our future. We really are at that crux in time when our choices, our values, our vision matter most. What do we truly hold dear? How passionate are we about the importance of truth, honor, accountability, integrity? What kind of a world do we want to create going forward?

We hold the future in our hands.

(T-326)

You Just Never Know – Day 747

Posted on by Lisa Weikel Leave a comment
Photo: L. Weikel

You Just Never Know

We’ve all heard the adage that we should never judge another until we’ve walked a mile in their shoes. And of course it’s an adage because it’s a truism, an expression of a common experience. The sticky part of this is that you just never know what shoes another person has worn. Nor do most of us know what anyone’s shoes are made of, where they’ve been, whether they were designed for how they’re worn, or how many times they’ve needed to be resoled.

I happened to have a couple discussions today with some people I care a lot about. Two main conversations took place with individuals who do not know each other, whose paths I don’t believe have crossed. If you were to meet them at a party or in the grocery store, you’d imagine their lives to be ones of relative good fortune. You wouldn’t be wrong in that assessment, and yet your conclusion wouldn’t be entirely accurate, either. Not by a long shot.

Photo: L. Weikel

Details

I’ve listened to the details of a lot of lives over the course of my own, and it never ceases to amaze me just how much some people are asked to endure. Whether the challenges consist of professional surprises that batter and smack them against rocky shores, the utter despair of comforting a child whose physical body seems incapable of finding peace or healing, discovering that the voices of a relationship blow past each other, unheard or misunderstood – most of these issues can be devastating in their singular experience. What’s astounding is realizing that a shocking number of people are, especially now, reeling from the experience of multiple traumas to heart and soul at one time.

We are living amongst the walking wounded. We’re also living amongst the bravest and most courageous of souls.

I imagine every single person reading this post is holding up their end of probably at least two or three deeply troublesome and thorny burdens. Attempting to compare them serves no purpose. The true point is that all around us our friends, acquaintances, colleagues, and loved ones are dealing with ‘stuff’ that threatens to grind us down to emotional nubs.

Different shoes. Some more worn down than others. Some may have lost any semblance of ability to protect the wearer from the road they’re traveling. And yet they – we – carry on.

It seems we’re all being pushed by forces far greater than us to face our challenges. To change if we must. To exercise compassion. To walk beside each other and not compare our struggles but support each on their – and our – own unique path.

Lots of shoes.

Photo: L. Weikel

(T-364)

Not Many Words – Day 593

Posted on by Lisa Weikel Leave a comment
Protective Hawk Cloud – Photo: L. Weikel

Not Many Words

I’ve been finding the last several days’ posts harder than usual to write. I find myself wishing for something entertaining or thoughtful to flow from my fingertips onto the keyboard, but not many words seem to have heard the call. Or if they’ve heard the call, they’re declining to volunteer for duty.

I’ve been limiting myself to mostly reading headlines and trying to stay away from my phone more generally.

Relishing the liminal moments of the day when fireflies and bats come out to play, we often don’t eat until close to 9:00 p.m.

The State of Things

I’m finding the state of our country increasingly upsetting. I’m horrified at the accuracy with which everything that’s unfolding in the South and the West was predicted. None of the surges in positive cases can come as a surprise to anyone who’s been paying attention. The crisis that New York and New Jersey faced in March and April were not because those states are dirty or crowded or governed by a Democrat.

I can only speak for myself, of course, but I find myself wanting to scream at these people who were very clearly sitting in judgment on New York and New Jersey a few months ago only to find themselves in an even worse predicament because they failed to prepare. They thought they were immune.

So much for the immunity of hubris.

Share Some Beauty

Instead of railing on these things, I’d rather share some photos from our walk tonight. The one at the top made me feel as though we’re still being protected. It reminded me of a giant hawk flying over us, wings outspread to protect us, again, like I’ve been taught to protect others at a Sacred Fire.

The other is simply a finger-painted sunset.

It feels especially important that we drink deeply of the beauty while we can.

Fingerpainted Sunset – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-518)

Any Port in the Storm – Day 553

Posted on by Lisa Weikel Leave a comment
Tigger and Spartacus snuggling – Photo: L. Weikel

Any Port in the Storm

Hey, sometimes it’s just nice to have somebody at your back. Or as my mother used to say, “Any port in the storm.”

Clearly that had to have been what Tigger and Spartacus were thinking the other day when I happened upon this surprising snugglefest taking place on our bed. When I walked up the wooden pie-shaped steps from our kitchen into our bedroom, I fumbled for my phone to capture the unexpected cuteness of the moment.

You can sort of see that Tigger woke up during my effort, which annoyed and disappointed me. They were so cute.

The photo above is ok, and it almost captures the magic – but not quite. If you can imagine it, when I initially walked into the room (in my defense, the wooden stairs do squeak), they were laying in that same position, spine to spine, but Tigger’s head was down and they were both very obviously completely at home and at peace, and deeply asleep. Surprisingly, their trust in each other was complete.

How Rare Is That?

All of which sort of makes me wonder. How rare is that, really? We hear talk of cats and dogs being natural enemies, but I think a lot of that is hype. In fact, in a lot of ways, that supposed rivalry seems more like propaganda that’s oddly based in human gender stereotypes than true feline/canine rivalry or inherent dislike.

I’ll bet almost everyone reading this knows of cats and dogs that have lived beyond peaceably within their own home. Heck, I’ve even witnessed Cletus (who we can all agree is beautiful but a real jerk, what with all his hissing and biting and unwarranted lashing out with claws at no provocation) walk up to Spartacus (who can become wild-eyed and a jerk himself if you try sticking your muzzle into his food bowl) and first flaunt his tail directly in Spart’s face and then turn around, chirrup at him, and groom Spartacus’s ear.

I thought for sure it was going to be curtains for both of them the first time I saw Cletus sidle up to Spartacus that way.

And I’ve seen all three of our cats cuddle with both dogs periodically. I remember having lots of photos of White Satan cuddling with Sheila and Spartacus. And at first, I thought the pups were simply being kind to him, realizing that he didn’t even comprehend that his behavior was socially inappropriate, since he was deaf. But apparently that wasn’t the case.

Makes Me Wonder

So much of what we think is based on stuff we’ve been told all our lives. Much of what underpins our belief systems are thoughts and opinions that we actually have never had to form through personal experience. We’ve simply taken someone else’s word for it. Usually, it was our parents’ word for things, but also our teachers’, our friends’, and the thoughts, prejudices, and assumptions of people on television.

It makes me wonder what life could be like – especially in our country, now, when so many seem to loathe those who aren’t like them – if we could just drop the hype and be real with each other.

Any port in the storm.

If we’re not careful, we may soon experience our own personal ‘any port in the storm’ moment, causing us to care for or be cared for by those whom society, or our parents, or even our president, has told us we should fear or loathe or judge as less than. Maybe then we’ll realize the truth.

What will we do then? How will we love? Will we snuggle up and keep each other warm against the cold?

Sheila, Spart, and White Satan – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-558)