I Dare You to Try Putting Me Out – Photo: L. Weikel

Changed Our Tune

Oh, how we changed our tune. The photo above is of a cat that is saying, “If you try to put me out, I will become feral in a way that you’ve never seen before. You will regret your decision and require stitches for the gaping wounds I intend to inflict upon you. You will rue your decision; of that, I am certain.” Don’t be fooled by that coy expression on his face. Trust me when I tell you, the flicking of the tail is deadly serious.

And it’s true. For the last four or five days, I’ve had to struggle to ‘put the cat out’ before I came to bed, and most of those nights I’ve failed spectacularly. Meaning I’ve given up and gone to bed, resigned to the fact that the beast will wake Karl up and demand to be let out when it’s more to his liking.

As I’ve written before, Cletus fancies himself a badass, Philly-style, and yet nothing could be further from the truth. He excels at getting his own way. And it’s not just with us. He wields his massive, long-haired tail like a scepter – or something more dangerous.

This Happens Occasionally

This refusal to take his normal dark-hour pilgrimage is initially perplexing. But it’s happened before, so it’ll likely happen again. After all, we have a lot of wild creatures living in our midst. And it only stands to reason that sometimes things can get a little scary for our handsome boy.

And yes, I do believe it’s his handsomeness that is making his nightly forays less desirable. He’s attracted a suitor and it’s not to his liking.

Karl and I both noticed his weird behavior as he approaches our kitchen door lately. Clearly, it’s that time of night and his wanderlust has once again risen unbidden. He wants to go out. He needs to go out. He begs, he yowls, he follows us around and asks to go out. He pulls the massive wooden door to our kitchen open with his paw, creaking as it swings open.

But when we walk toward the door? He backs away. He hisses at us. He acts as if it’s our idea that he go out and play with others. If I manage to corral him safely enough toward the kitchen door that I feel I can nudge him into outside, he furtively looks both ways as he almost holds his breath and plunges out the door. It’s the weirdest thing. He almost looks like a cop bursting into an abandoned building, his handgun cocked and ready for anything.

It’s quite obvious he’s been spooked and is afraid he’ll get ambushed yet again.

Could Be Anything – But I Think It’s Love

As I’ve mentioned, even just sitting here on the couch, I’ve heard foxes yipping and owls calling in to each other in the trees. Coyotes live in the vicinity as well – and there have even been a few bear sightings recently. Opossums routinely munch on the sunflower seeds.

But it was last night that I discovered a clue. I’ve made it a habit to turn on both the porch light and the garage’s floodlight before I let the cat out. Just in case, I want to scare anything away.

Last night Mr. (or very well may be Mrs.) Gorgeous was back on the premises. I saw it hanging around the garage.

Aha. It’s Pepé Le Pew! Cletus has a suitor! And a pungent one, at that.

Unsurprisingly, it all makes sense.

Gorgeous, Again – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-119)