OC Clouds – Photo: L. Weikel
Whenever I Call You Friend…
Anyone who’s around the same age as I am will probably start humming when they read the title to this post.
Yes, I’m conjuring this classic from Kenny Loggins and Stevie Nicks because it was the theme song and backdrop to the relationships that we made and which in many ways shaped our burgeoning adulthood.
We were busy trying on personas – figuring how who we were and how we wanted to be in the world. We were using each other as testing grounds. We saw each other at our most vulnerable. We held each other close when we weren’t sure who we were, how we wanted to be in the world, or why we loved who we loved when we loved them.
A Bigler Reunion
I’m reflecting tonight on the times spent in Bigler Hall because I’m lucky enough to be spending the weekend with a bunch of friends I made something like 40 years ago. No. I stand corrected. It has to be 41 or 42 years, at least, since most of us met as freshmen or sophomores up at Penn State’s Main Campus. And like most such reminiscences, it is amazing how easily we all fall back into the camaraderie we had those decades – lifetimes – ago.
It’s true that the whole gang isn’t here. Luckily, as far as we know, it’s simply a matter of distance or other commitments that preclude all of us getting together this weekend. Truth be told, Quick-Karl was as important a part of this group as any of the rest of us, as was Goum. We were not ‘ladies only,’ by any means – and the use of the term ‘ladies’ itself is, well, laughable. Leigh-Wee and Oozie-Q are gaping holes in this reunion, to be sure. But hopefully we’ll get another chance…
Some Ocean City Love – Photo: L. Weikel
How many hairbrushes were used as microphones to croon to each other the heartfelt bond we felt as we took refuge in the relative safety yet sometimes utter insanity that was but a blip on our radar screens before plunging into a world that we both eagerly anticipated and freaked out over facing?
I personally find it fascinating how those couple of years we spent together actually feel, in retrospect, like they took place over a much longer period of time. We packed so much living into those moments. So much life happened to us during those college years: so many changes in majors; so many passionate opinions and embraces; so many experiments with going walking a fine line and occasionally going overboard. Sometimes we lost our inhibitions, and in doing so, lost our fears. As we lost our training wheels, so too did we occasionally lose our balance.
But through it all, the thick and the thin, the perms and the turkey hoagies (with extra mayo), the hot stickies and the stickie hotties (OK, I made that up – but it’s late and it is something gross I would say just to see if you were paying attention), one thing we could always count on was that someone would be there to call us friend.
And the coolest thing is that this fact continues to be true – perhaps even more now than then.
This song really and truly captures the best of those years. We were lucky to find each other then. And we’re lucky to have each other now.
Bregettes (A Representative Sample) – Photo: Paulette Speaker
Whenever I Call You “Friend”
Written by Kenny Loggins and M. Manchester.
Whenever I call you friend
I begin to think I understand
Anything we are
You and I have always been ever and ever
I see myself within your eyes
And that’s all I need to show me why
Everything I do, always takes me home to you
Ever and ever
Now I know my life has given me more
Than memories day by day…we can see
(SN)
In every moment there’s a reason to carry on
Sweet love showin’ us a heavenly light
I’ve never seen such a beautiful sight
Sweet love flowin’ almost every night
I know forever we’ll be doin’ it
Sweet love showin’ us a heavenly light
I’ve never seen such a beautiful sight
Sweet love flowin’ almost every night
I know forever we’ll be doin’ it right
Whenever I call you friend
I believe…
Until next time, friend (there will always be a chair for you) – Photo: L. Weikel
(T-769)
Guerkey,
You were always a hell of a writer and social commentator, but you captured the emotions of every Bregette, were we in OC this past weekend, or on a native reserve in Ontario, Canada.
You captured my thoughts on 1977-1978 in Bigler with all of us there, as well as the frat next to Rec Hall with that amazing deck the summer of 1978 or 1979.
We are who we are today because of our trials, failures, and successes in Bigler and PSU at large.
Distance never interfered with my love of all you, including Quik Carl and Goumba!
Your photography is beautiful, thanks for the memories and I promise to make the next reunion.
Always,
Leigh-wee!
Speaking of someone who’s a “hell of a writer,” your words mean so much, Leigh. Thank you.
You were missed this weekend! Although it does make us Penn State Proud that you know how to paddle a dragonboat like a LION.
Oh – and a little bird might suggest that you pencil in the weekend of October 23-25, 2020. LBI. Be there.
Consider it penciled in ❤️