shock Archives - Owl Medicine: Shamanic Healing

Feeling Very Loved

Man oh man, it’s been a week. Wait. What? It’s not over yet, you say? Well, I guess that’s technically true (and not a little scary). All I can say at this moment, though, is that I’m feeling very loved – and I have all of you to thank for that.

When I wrote my post last Sunday night, I was worried. I’d intended to write another anthropomorphized vegetable tale, but obviously that silliness was pre-empted. I may or may not regain the light-hearted silliness required to write about the carrot that arrived from the CSA last weekend.

As most of you know, it doesn’t matter what I may have tucked in the back of my mind as a possible topic on any given evening. Ultimately, I always opt to share my state-of-being in the moment. And I could feel in my bones that, even though he just seemed ‘punk’ throughout the day, Spartacus’s malaise was rapidly degrading into something far more concerning.

Community of Compassion

I want to tell all of you how much your words and gestures of love and compassion have meant to me this week. The first few days of the week were a blur of action and driving and shock. The next few felt like a slow-motion pileup of emotions – as well as that weird unable-to-catch-your-breath feeling of having the wind knocked out of you. That’s the feeling that accompanies sudden, irretrievable loss. It’s like a WOMP right to the solar plexus.

My wish is that none of you ever have to feel it. But of course, I know many of you already have. Whether you have or you haven’t experienced that feeling, reading about it is a gift. Not a gift to you necessarily. But definitely a gift to the writer. It’s a gift that you gut through it long enough to share in the emotions as hard as they may be to read, and then – even more amazingly – take the time to write a comment in response.

Can I tell you how much it meant to me to pull up FB on my phone and just see how many people had reacted? And then the shock of seeing the number of comments? I felt arms around me and a solidarity of shared compassion just in looking at those numbers.

To be honest, I didn’t have the emotional bandwidth to read your sweet and loving comments until yesterday. It was a comfort simply to know you cared enough to write to me. I needed to wait a full day to take the time to scroll through them and then truly take in your love.

We Are Kindred Spirits

The level of compassion and understanding with which so very many of you responded was enlightening. The heartfelt responses I received from you were not a reflection of the quality of my writing. No. They were a reflection of the love that each and every one of you has experienced first-hand. Experienced – and then been forced to release into the ethers. Because that’s the nature of our lives.

The array of responses revealed something else, too: You’re all a bunch of lovers. We love and we let go.

The fact that I’m lucky enough to have so many people (from all over the world, I might add) in my life, sharing this journey, holding each other’s hands when any one of us is hurting, is a treasure. It’s not easy to live our lives with awareness. It’s hard to choose to feel – and not run from the hard stuff.

Thank you for being the kind softies you all revealed yourselves to be. I love being part of our community of compassion. I dare say it’s because we have each other that we pick ourselves up every day and refuse to give in to the darkness that threatens all of us every once in a while.

(T-64)

Cloud Shark – Photo: L. Weikel

Hold On

I’m not going to sugar coat it: last week was pretty awful. And each day seemed to take us a couple steps further down the road to – where, exactly? I’m not sure. But no matter how you look at things, I’m pretty sure you’ll agree that they’re going to get worse this week. And all we can do is hold on.

One reason things will get worse this week is because this is the first Monday of a week in which, almost everywhere, if you’re not considered an employee in an ‘essential industry’ then you will be home.

Shock to the System

This whole concept, the very idea that so many of us will no longer have an office to report to, will come as a shock to not only ‘the’ system but ‘our’ systems as well: not only our national, regional, and local economic systems, but also to our internal systems, our sense of who we are and how we personally fit into the world.

I’m not saying this to be doom and gloom. I’m saying this so you can prepare your internal system – your navigation system, your system of balance, your sense of self and how you go about your day, your comprehension of your place in the Universe. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to arrive and people are going to feel like they’ve been playing The Game of Life and their dog just bounded into the room and upended the game board, scattering the pieces to the four winds.

Boom.

We’re In This Together

If I can assure any of you reading this right now of anything, I want you to know that we’re all in this together. Every single one of us is going to be impacted by either the Coronavirus (Covid-19) or the economics of basically having our entire economy slow to a point where it’s a shell of its former self. And let’s face it: many if not most of us may ultimately end up having to deal with both.

As the week starts off, I’d like to suggest that you smudge your home. You’ll recall that smudging is a cleansing ritual in which you use the smoke of a burning bundle of sage (or of some leaves of sage burning in an appropriate container) to cleanse and purify your environment. Even just lighting up some sage and breathing in the scent can clear your head and help shift your perspective.

I feel we could all benefit from setting ourselves up for success as we set out on our quests this week.

And quests they are: discovering who we are when all our familiar touchstones (for us adults, our jobs or vocations, our workplaces, our favorite places to work out or be with friends, and for our children, our schools, our sports and competitions, our musicals and school plays and band practice) are suddenly gone or unavailable to us…

Pondering the Questions

Who are we when all the things we’ve done almost without thinking for as long as we can remember are taken away from us? Who are we when we have no errands to run? No clients to call? Who are we when we suddenly have the time to do those things we’ve told ourselves we’d rather be doing? Maybe those yearnings should’ve been updated a decade ago. Maybe they’re no longer a reflection of our dreams? Maybe they were an illusion, a fantasy that simply kept us from loving our lived experience.

As we figure these things out, it’s important we remember: we’re all in this together. We’re going to get through it. It’s true, we may find that some people and situations – including ourselves – are a disappointment. These realizations will call for adjustments. But all in all? I’d wager we’re going to discover some amazing treasures along the way. Precisely because we’re all in this together.

So hold on. Take heart. Wash your hands; keep your distance; and know that together we can get through anything. And we’re going to come through it all transformed.