Our Collective Feelings – Day 940

9 of Cups – Tarot of the Crone by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince

Our Collective Feelings

If you’re feeling edgy or antsy, I want you to know you’re not alone. Not by a long shot. If you feel like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop or perhaps sense some inchoate dread percolating just under the surface, you’ve got company. And the weather – I swear, it’s mirroring the reality of what so many of us are experiencing emotionally. The heat of summer is here too soon. It’s breaking records. And the humidity is oppressive, plain and simple. Our collective feelings are on display for all of us to enjoy.

Realizing we’re not in this alone can be helpful. There is comfort in shared concern.

I decided to ask the Crone to share some wisdom with us tonight. Of course, I’m referring to my Tarot of the Crone deck by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince.

As usual, my question was straightforward: What is our best strategy to navigate what we’re about to encounter?

I chose the 9 of Cups, with the IX Hermit underneath, giving the entire situation context.

The first thing I notice is that both cards are 9s, which generally represent completion and endings. And we’ve had this card appear to us before (last July).

Nine of Cups ~ Healing

“I am the Many and One

I am whole who has been broken

I am the power of redemption

I am the renewal of creation

Two unusual beings, with ribbons of red life spiraling through the serene lavender of their skin-like cloaks, touch and twist and merge in the creation of something wonderful, whole and new. The Nine of Cups represents healing of the heart and soul: when what has been separated comes together again, when feeling flows free and true, when you are aligned with your greatest good, when you become more than you believed you could. The authenticity of your self is not subsumed by bonds with others, but is enhanced through acting with integrity and love.”

Underneath this card that’s enticing us to embrace a state of healing is the Hermit card. I love the perspective on this card that the author/creator gives us:

IX – Hermit – Tarot of the Crone by Ellen Lorenzi-Prince

IX – Hermit

“I speak

No one listens

But I know what I know

The Hermit is a bag lady rejected by and rejecting comfortable society. She stands on the street of a faceless city, her own face exposed and eloquent. Her dress is a blue that recalls the depths of ocean and sky and the boundlessness that lies beyond their shallow edges. She carries her bags in both hands because she’s learned that balance gives her endurance. She is alone but her isolation is the result not the goal of her journey. Where she goes, others cannot follow. She seeks the mystery at the core of life, at the core of herself. She looks for the magic that exists even in the most artificial environment. She seeks answers to questions that have not yet been born.
The Hermit says look to yourself for the answers, look into the worlds inside you and the uncharted realms within, behind and beyond the ordinary. There are secrets only you are meant to discover and truths only you can divine.”

My Take

We’re all in this together, and if we recognize the power of our interdependence, we can heal the pain, discord, and chaos we’re creating. Yet we’re each responsible for our own perspective, as well as the decisions that flow from how we interpret all that’s occurring around us. This is a time for all of us to step up and take responsibility for ourselves and, yes, each other.

We can do this. It’s time to end the insanity. But in order to achieve a state of healing we need to sit alone with ourselves and take an honest look at what lies within our core – each one of us, individually. It’s time to discover the secrets we’ve been hiding from ourselves. Only then can we move forward together.

(T-171)

Little Things – Day 678

Photo: L. Weikel

Little Things

Sometimes we have to find magic in the little things. If we don’t, we run the risk of feeling overwhelmed by the big things.

I find that a couple of photos I took this morning are bringing me a measure of sweetness. No matter how upset we humans are (or aren’t) by certain losses and activities and diseases that may be upending our lives, the creatures and other beings with whom we share this planet just keep on keeping on.

Baby Sparrow – Photo: L. Weikel

They eat, they sleep, they wave and bob their heads in the breeze.

They brighten our days and bring magic to our nights. (I’m talking to you, Barred Owl.)

And sometimes they’re all I want to think or write about.

Photo: L. Weikel

I don’t want to think one more thought about the state of affairs we humans find ourselves in. Not one more thought this evening.

I want to look at the squirrel snoozing on a branch just outside my bedroom window. I want to celebrate the bright beauty of the Heliopolis blooming along the side of our road. I want to revel in the fluffy adorableness of a baby bird just getting its bearings, or a red squirrel caressing a peanut it stealthily (in its mind) snagged from the peanut loop.

When the huge stuff pulls you down, take time to find the magic in the little things. Give them permission to pull you back up.

Munching – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-433)

Lifted My Spirits – Day 562

Sunlit Forest – Photo: L. Weikel

Lifted My Spirits

I’m so relieved that the weather today was as bright and warm as it was. I needed it. It lifted my spirits.

I can’t figure out why I was feeling so down today. The Memorial Day weekend was pleasant enough. I missed seeing our kids, but there have been other holidays, pre-Covid-19, when we weren’t able to get together. So it’s not as if it felt like the gaping hole in our summer opening extravaganza that I know other people experienced.

And we did manage to walk every day, despite initial calls for rain. Thank goodness!

Today was hard, though.

Ugly Out There

The best I can figure is that I’m starting to feel a bit overwhelmed by all the ugliness ‘out there.’

Last night, just before settling down to write about my love of Ents, I saw the video of the woman in Central Park, who earlier yesterday rabidly threatened to call 911 to report a man who was taking video of her breaking the leash law in an area devoted to birding. I’m sure most of you know all about her very obvious use of her white privilege to threaten this man for daring to video her flaunting the park rules.

It sickened me to see how she treated this man.

And then there’s the horrific story of the man in Minneapolis who was murdered by police officers, one of whom literally had his knee on the man’s neck as the man cried out that he couldn’t breathe. I could not bring myself to watch the video of that incident. Merely seeing the still shot of the cop with his knee on the man’s neck was enough to make me want to throw up. This type of stuff happens every day. Almost always with impunity, although apparently – hopefully – not this time. But it all makes me wonder how black and brown people do not despair of such cruelty. How do any of us not despair of this cruelty to one another?

So no, I’m not going to link to either of these videos. If you haven’t seen them, they are pretty much everywhere. Which may be why I was feeling more and more depressed today as the day wore on.

Between those two incidents and the videos of people spitting on or verbally abusing clerks who were trying to enforce mask use in their stores, or people deliberately defying public health recommendations… I don’t know. I just felt profoundly sad over the state of humanity.

Took a Walk

So Karl and I took another one of our walks. I’m sharing a couple photos I took. The beauty we encountered was heartening and peaceful. Once again, walking lifted my spirits. Once again, Mother Earth reminded me of the beauty that surrounds us if we take the time and make the effort to look for it.

As usual, walking brings me peace. Here’s a recent article reinforcing just how and why walking is so great for us – especially now.

I’m going to keep on walking. If you haven’t walked in a while, I urge you to go for it. It helps. And we all need all the help we can get right now.

Rhododendron – Photo: L. Weikel

(T-549)

Overwhelm – Day 346

Dark Clouds – Photo: L. Weikel

Overwhelm

I’m feeling it.

Is it just me?

I feel as though I’ve been amazingly fortunate, the past 345 days or so, to almost always discover something to write about. At least something that was not akin to what my husband Karl has more than once very unhelpfully suggested to me as he headed to bed, leaving me on the couch with laptop at the ready:

“Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy. Jack is a very good boy…”

(That’s a reference to Stephen King’s The Shining, in case you either had no idea what I meant by that or thought ‘Jack Nicholson,’ yet couldn’t quite place it.)

Stuck

Yeah, I’m feeling that, too. But no, I’m drawn to explore the overwhelm  a bit further.

While I try not to talk politics a lot in my posts, sometimes the state of our country seeps into my writing. It’s hard to ignore. It’s hard to pretend that what’s happening at the highest levels of our government isn’t having a ripple effect both worldwide and on the most personal of levels.

Worldwide

On the world stage, the stunning selfishness and corruption has resulted in us betraying our allies, which of course – aside from becoming an immediate cause of death for many – will lead to others being wary of teaming up with us in the future. We’re no longer the sure thing. We’re no longer the country that aspires to be the world leader in all things just, admirable, innovative, and courageous.

We’ve lost our moral authority. (And yes, I know; we’ve not been perfect by any means. But overall? We’ve been a beacon of hope, light, and freedom to the world.

I’m feeling a sense of overwhelming despair that this is no longer true.

There’s a naïve part of me that chirps, “But as soon as we prove that we will not tolerate such blatant corruption, that our system of checks and balances will curb the egregious excesses and abuses of power, surely the rest of the world will ‘come back’ to working with us?!”

As each day unfolds, I’m feeling a despair in the pit of my self. I’m starting to despair that we can recover our stature. And I am not the despairing type. Yet…

Our Personal Microcosms

On the most personal of levels, I’m also feeling the overwhelm that’s blanketing all of us. Every day we’re confronted with a fire hose of revelations of how more and more and more ‘norms’ are just flagrantly ignored.

Norms – ways of behaving in a civil society that we, as a culture, take for granted and therefore do not need to legislate (i.e., we don’t need to create laws or rules that explicitly state what is right or wrong) – create a fundamental security. They’re sort of the ‘everybody knows what a red light or a stop sign means’ coupled with ‘we can rely on people stopping at these.’

I’m not saying that we, either personally or culturally, should become slaves to norms. I’m almost always behind a little well-intentioned effort to shake things up now and again.

It’s the Relentlessness

But the constant, day in and day out, flagrant and deliberate flaunting of norms is debilitating to our personal psyches. It’s wearing us all out. Even the people who chant inane tropes at rallies are, if they pay attention to their lives and their mental, emotional, and physical health, being worn the hell out by the constant barrage of uncertainty and unkindness, disrespect and despair.

Norms of polite society are disintegrating. People are starting, more and more, to just do what they want. There’s a growing disregard for simply doing the right thing for the right thing’s sake.

Yikes; this got dark.

I’m hoping this ‘overwhelm’ will pass quickly. It’s beating the hell out of my normally optimistic and idealistic nature. And while I suspect many of you are feeling it too, I do have to wonder: Is it just me?

I’ll do my best to bring a better game tomorrow.

(T-765)