The pileated woodpecker who visited on my birthday – Photo: L. Weikel

Stress Eating

I’m sitting here on my couch once again trying to think of something even remotely interesting to write about and all I feel like doing is eating. Stress eating, since I can’t say I’m particularly hungry. But I crave endorphins. I want some comfort.

Seriously. I sit here noticing that my brain is saying, “Have some chocolate.”

“No.”

“No? Why not? It’s OK. Certainly better than ice cream.”

“Ooooh, yeah…ice cream would be so delicious. Thank goodness we don’t have any in the house. And anyway, no!”

I’m even contemplating excavating a beer from the bowels of my refrigerator (which of course is continuing its relentless on/off nonsense, but since the repairman essentially said he could attempt to repair it but it likely wouldn’t fix the problem and could easily cost close to half the price of a new refrigerator, we decided to just use it until it conks out). And anyway, the only reason I would drink a beer would be to get a buzz – and my pleasure in that would be short-lived, at best.

Think of Other Things

I don’t want to follow up on the disappearing birds post just yet. It’s too early; too soon. While I’m hearing from a number of people who live near me that they’re noticing the bird disappearance as well, I’m sort of feeling like I should give it a few more days. Maybe they’ll come back.

Although that seems unlikely.

Beyond the local corroboration, I’ve also heard from a few others as well. From places as far away as the southern Jersey coast, Baltimore, and even western North Carolina, when called to their attention, people are noticing that things are suddenly quiet. And the quiet is sudden: it’s been about two weeks or so.

The Elephant in the Room

Then there’s politics. I could write about that. But…no. I’d rather stress eat. In fact, what we’re all watching unfold (if we’re paying attention) is both riveting and revolting.

I feel like we’re going to have the limits of our republic tested over the coming days, weeks, and months. I am adamant that I do not want to gain weight over everything that’s going to come out and be revealed. And quite frankly, that’s why I’m not going to eat anything now – neither to soothe myself nor to quell my yearning for a ‘win’ – because I refuse to sabotage myself.

So this is where I am this evening. Up-to-date on breaking news. Falling asleep mid-sentence to the deeply resonant snoring of Sheila. Dealing with it all by contemplating snarfing up something sweet.

Fair warning? I may not be able to muzzle myself over politics much longer. I don’t know. I feel like something even bigger than has been unfolding this week and last may ‘drop’ tomorrow.

In the meantime? Stay strong, my friends. Big changes are coming. And while the change itself may be hard and painful as we move through it, I hold firm to a vision that we will come through this stronger, healthier as a nation, and more compassionate.

(T-785)