Breathe Through It

My pinky finger is hurting even more tonight. Why? Because I apparently didn’t give it enough attention by writing about it last night. No. It yearned for more, as many a rogue pinky does; so it made more of a hang nail apparent early this afternoon, which I rewarded by practically maiming myself by gnawing at it with a vengeance not seen since the movie in which that guy was mauled by a bear. Ah yes, The Revenant.

I’ve even succumbed to the suggestion made by a few of you: application of a Band-Aid. For the record: I don’t have any WonderWoman Band-Aids. So I traced the weird outline created by the blood-letting that resulted from my gnashing – and voilà – a work of art. And given that I’m an Earth Pig, there’s no way I was going to wrap my pinky in a Band-Aid that resembles a strip of bacon. But thanks for the suggestion (I think?)

In the meantime, in case anyone’s wondering, I keep picking the damn Dolphin card. On Friday, I picked Dolphin squared (you’ll recall, that means I picked Dolphin right side up, with a blank card on the bottom of the deck). Then Saturday I chose Skunk reversed with Dolphin underneath. And today? I chose Dolphin reversed/Buffalo.

So, if I were one to ‘judge’ the cards (which I try not to do, but when I become petulant, I’ve been known to engage in some pithy repartee with my ego), I’d say I’ve impressively gone from bad to worse in record time. Or more honestly, from great to crappy.

Dolphin Up, Dolphin Down, Dolphin Inside Out

Dolphin is all about breathing, which is ironic, given that my 1111 Devotion is dedicated to Karl, who drowned. Yes indeed, it is true; we cannot live without oxygen for more than a few minutes. And quite frankly, I feel sad every time I read those words because they remind me of him, and frustrated as they apply to me. I’m literally starting to feel claustrophobic and my breathing becomes a little shallow when I look around and consider how complicated everything feels at the moment.

Particularly when I read (as I did so long ago , upon choosing Dolphin reversed another time) – and received such startling clarity from it:

“…Dolphin was given a new job. He became the carrier of messages of our progress.”

And “…This can be a time when you are to link with Great Spirit and bring answers to your own questions or to those of others. (…)”

As I said yesterday, I’m getting dial tones in abundance, both for myself and for many of the people around me who seem to be struggling as well.

So breathe, I tell myself. Stop going after your pinky as if you’ve chosen the Beaver card – or Bear.

Hoping Clarity Will Arrive With the Full Moon

I realize this post has been a bit haphazard. But the full moon is approaching and, with it, perhaps some elucidation will arrive on Tuesday as well. At the very least, I’m hoping a shift will take place and answers will begin revealing themselves.

While I may seem as if I’m kvetching, I want to assure you: I have the utmost faith that my path will be made clear. I’m just sharing the love with you guys because it feels important somehow not to sugar coat this stuff.

I certainly, definitely, without question, and unequivocally do not have all the answers. But my ‘peeps,’ as I lovingly but perhaps slightly irreverently call them, do. Always. Especially when I’m asking on behalf of others. But if I’m saying always, I mean always (even for me).

My point in sharing my anguish is to foster transparency. Too often these days, I get the feeling we give up if something doesn’t come through at the tap of a finger or the moment we ask.

We need to breathe through it. We need to relax. We need to be still and listen to the signals being sent to us.

Thanks for keeping me company – and for holding the faith with me.